What the hell is Ditch the Tiara?

Redefining the word beautiful...one dirty, sweaty, bruised up mile at a time, with a few downward dogs along the way...

Friday, October 22, 2010

Week 29

Mike's surgery was yesterday and he had 5 fractures in his clavicle.  After a 3 1/2 hour surgery and his collar bone was put back together again...he's the modern day humpty dumpty except instead of falling off a wall, he fell off a bike. and he's not shaped like an egg.  Thankfully.  The pain however, on a scale of 1 to 10 is a 300.  Oh my poor baby.  Thank GOD his mother volunteered without hesitation to get on a plane and come here to help.  Mike has been in a valium and vicodin induced state, sleeping 60% of the day away, at the least.  In 6 weeks, he'll be good as new.  He is officially on the mend.

In the meantime, I am muddling through my training, struggling with  my own feelings of guilt. I can do all the things Mike can't.  Cut my own food.  Put on a tshirt.  Take a shower.  Not to mention, swimming, biking and running.  Also, on top of Ironman and Mike's accident, I have been in my own "personal hell" dealing with feelings, emotions and experiences from my past that have absolutely nothing to do with what is going on now.  3 months into therapy and I am left feeling raw, exposed and incredibly lonely.  I am figuring out who my real friends are and the list is rather short.  That's perfectly ok though...less is more. 

I am really looking forward to this weekend.  A 120 mile ride that is only possible because the mother in law is here and my birthday.  A little sunshine in a rather cloudy house. 

4 comments:

Christi said...

I am really sorry to hear about Mike's accident. I hope that he heals quickly!

I hope that you have a great race in Florida! I will be watching and rooting for yor from afar.

Jen said...

I'm sorry it's been a hard time, not just for Mike and you and Mike but for you. I know how difficult those times of introspection can be...wondering if there's a light out of our own heads. I just read this...maybe it will help

http://milemarkers.runnersworld.com/2010/10/connecting-the-dots.html

Kristin A is one of my faves...always good words!

michelle.belle. said...

hey, love you sis. our journey's recently have been seperate, but equally emotional, so I understand.
xo and ++ , MJD

Cara said...

Thinking about you both right now! Miss you!